So I’ve decided to do a Constance.
This has become a bit of a saying between one of my friends and myself. “Are you having a Constance moment? Are you doing a Constance? What would Constance do?”
If you haven’t yet come across Constance Hall, you must be living under a rock…..in a cave…..in Antarctica. Constance is a blogger, author, mother and hard core feminist. She’s a touch more “out there” than vanilla little me, and has an inspiring disregard for what people think of her. She speaks her mind, posts what she wants and stands up for her beliefs and values. And at the end of the day, usually cops a battering for it.
So, in our little friendship, doing a Constance means that you spoke your mind, told the truth, gave your own opinion…….and couldn’t give two hoots about what people thought.
So I am doing a Constance.
I have had a bit of an epiphany in my mid thirties, that the prim and proper teenager and girl of her mid twenties, (I still consider myself prim and proper, I don’t think I’ll ever epiphany myself out of that!) who was so concerned with what people thought, keeping other people happy and thought everyone was judging her is long gone.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m no Constance Hall and never will be. I often read on in awe as she spills the beans about her own latest epiphany, relationship hiccup or emotional meltdown, not scared to put her life out there for others to learn from. But that’s not me. I love to share, love to write and love to blog….but it’s not my personality to put it out there like Constance does.
For me, my “doing a Constance” epiphany came when I realised that I no longer took it personally if someone disliked what I had to say, what I was wearing or even, just disliked me. I realised that my life is too short to try and please everyone and keep everyone happy. That I really had nothing to prove to anyone, except myself. I was no longer that 25 year old, worried about what they thought of what I had to say, what I was wearing or how I was living my life. And my biggest epiphany of all, they probably never thought of it at all!
I have enough belief in my own intelligence to not be worried about having an opinion. I have, at the ripe old age of 35, realised that no one remembers what I wore yesterday and they probably won’t take any notice of what I’m wearing tomorrow. They are too busy with their own chaos to worry about mine, and the people that I spent my twenties trying to prove myself to, probably didn’t even notice!
It’s a nice place to be…...and I wish I had’ve gotten here sooner.