Do you sometimes feel like you have kind of lost yourself? You look back to who you used to be and how you used to be and think, “Where did that girl go?”
I remember once saying to my husband, in one of those busy, cranky moments, “I used to be the funny one!” When I was little, in my family of four kids, I was the funny one. I was quirky and creative and never quite fit in. I remember reading my sister’s journal once, (Sorry Lovely, but we shared a bedroom for eighteen years, it was going to happen eventually), and in it she described me as the black sheep of the family. Not in a bad way. Just in that I was always a little bit left of centre, would often come out with bizarre sayings and would do bizarre things….but over the years…..I have become…..well, normal.
I became a mum and a wife and a teacher and a woman...and somewhere in the process I have started to lose myself.
Perhaps lost isn’t the right verb. I’m not lost….underneath it all, I am still there. But in the busy routines of motherhood, being a wife and being a teacher, I sometimes feel like there is less of me and more and more of what I need to be or should be for everyone else.
No, I don’t think I am lost. But I do think that as mothers and wives and, in my case, teachers, we do sometimes need to turn the focus away from what we are doing for everyone else and back towards ourselves. Not for ever, or even a long time, but just every now and then. So that we don’t get lost.
Over the next week, maybe two….let’s be realistic, probably three, I am going to write a series of articles focusing on not losing ourselves in the routines that we are all so caught up in. I’m sure I’ll come up with a better title at some stage, but at this stage let’s just call it a How To….or more accurately a Why it’s Important Not To.
Why it’s Important Not to Lose Yourself as a …...
Four articles…..with the goal of getting some clarity for myself….and hopefully one or two of you. Clarity around how and why it’s time to turn the focus back to myself…..just a little bit and a little more often.
It’s an amazing time of life. Being a mum, a partner, having a career…..but it doesn’t mean that we have to lose our original selves in the process.